With YOU...

Today I was reminded of this B E Autiful scene in Dil Chahtha hai..

Akshaye Khanna takes beach sand in his fist and clenches it hard; most of the sand goes from between his fingers as he tries to cling on to it. He says - “See this sand? The tighter you hold it, the quicker it slips through your fingers. ”

But while you are still holding it, open you hand.. and it will remain… with you…

Ofcourse...!!!

Not so long ago, I had stopped to blog for a while in between coz I was apprehensive of what folks might think abt me.. But on “second thoughts” it struck me..if I were actually thinking abt what others think of me… I should have maintained a secret diary like Anne Frank and written in that, whatever I felt like…But that’s not what I wanted… There seemed to be a desire within me… to put the stuff twirling in my mind… out here..

Most of times. we find ourselves making “judgments” with a prejudice based on the past experiences with a person… And this has been something I would like to overcome...No assumptions as far as possible… coz I have changed a lot as a person… and so might have the other person…. Mostly, as i sit to blog, I've felt that I can express my feelings more rationally (Hey, I am trying).. Inspite of this, many a times, we censor certain emotions or thoughts to let our “image” remain the way we want it to be perceived.. A sweet person or a rebel or jus a wisecrack… so I feel there are pretty much high chances of hypocrisy becoming a part of your blogs even without your own realization.. The blog is a part of you.. but the part which you are willing to show everyone…

Since a few days, I had again been feeling a kinda block in the flow of my thoughts as I was wondering.. “What will be thought about me???

And I began to fear that if I let these apprehensions "remain…" I might forget that I'm blogging here to let my thoughts .. flow its own due course…

That made me ask… “So can i continue to blog “anything”?”

Without any hesitation, pat came the reply…. “Ofcourse”

And that blissful “moment” was enough…

Grow up !!!

Recently I have had folks all around me discuss about one of the topic which I consider most dear to me. KIDS...

One of the things that I love about them is the genuine smile….. which for some obnoxious reasons which I could never comprehend, you rarely receive from adults. Well, we have got problems you see..yeah , right!!!

Anyways…what seems to be getting on my nerves recently is how people think of children as their lineage carrier.. and most of them happily use EMB (Emotional blackmail) and get their children to do what they want to be done..I am in a kinda rambling mode coz of the…

Conversation in the cafeteria

E : Today my mother in law asked my kid, - “Shall I comb your hair?”.. My daughter shooed her away and said “my” mom will do that. You go away…?” I felt so happy and proud of my child..

F : Wow.. you have got a smart kid.. Good you have a control over your kid

G : Aaaaaa… what was wrong in having her grandmother comb her hair…

F : Whats wrong.. Today she will comb the hair, tmrw she will tell the kid to not speak to her mother and even before you realize the kids will be in their control

E : I know..

G : Why are you so sure that is how its gonna happen.. Maybe your kid might have a nice time with her too

E : Oh no G, you don’t understand.. What will you do if tmrw you kid , on their coercion screams something at you or asks you to get out.. Your own kid saying that to you.. Wouldn’t that hurt you..

G: Well, at that moment I will think of what the kid is.. he or she is after all… a kid…

F : Yes.. but don’t you see how you let them manipulate your kid against you..

G There are something you can teach them .. and somethings they will have to learn on their own.. Like what is right and whats not.., But you cant imagine something is gonna go wrong and stop the kid from falling down, getting hurt, getting up and running again…

E : You are not understanding.. Its your kid.. A part of you…

G : : But isn’t the kid another person.. I mean.. like everyone else.. Yes, its my blood and flesh.. that’s abt it… I am going to take care of the upbringing,,, But why should I stop it from enjoying love and care which it might get from whomsoever around..

F : You wont understand it now, G.. only when you have a baby, you will be hooked and the maternal instinct will want you to have the baby to yourself..

G : What abt if I adopt a baby? Then will I still be having the same feelings….

E : Oh noooooooooo.. There has been and will always be a difference between your own kid and an adopted one ..

G : Why should there be… a baby is a baby is a baby…

F : There is a definite difference..the bond is not there… so tmrw you might not feel so attached to the adopted one..

G : Eggjactly my point.. why should I attach myself to my own kid as well.. I will definitely love my kid like crazy.. but what should make me think that just becoz it is my own blood , the kid is gonna love me forever or that I have the hell of a “right” to be in control of this person…

E : Oh forget it G.. Its not the same… you will hopefully understand sometime in future what we say…

G : And I hope not..

F : Oh yes you will ….When you experience the wonder of getting to see your “own” baby grow up in front of you….

G : Hmmm…. Alright….Will leave it at that.. What still seems to bothers me is… who needs to grow up…..


As i blog i am feeling proud of what i said and felt.. and here i am reminded of what a friend once quoted

Insanity is to expect others to behave like you would.

Normality is the capacity to accept that they might not...

Hope i can grow up too...

Welcome...

Hope and pray that you are blessed in abundance with all the goodness.. that will be around you... Loads of cuddles and smooches, my little one...

Lag jao…

My dear witch of portbello said once to me, “If you want something with all your heart.. you will get it, no matter what…

In OSO, charming Srk says, “Kehte hain, agar kisi cheez ko dil se chaaho, tho puri kayanat usse, tumse milane ki khoshish mein lag jaathi hain..

Tho lag jao…

Kyonki picture “Abi” bakki hai…

Some times....

Shelly drew this... which reminded of many things.. And she says "Don’t we all want someone to hold us, to nurture us, protect us? I understand this need so much more deeply now that I have children"



I am nearly finished with reading "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus". Apart from the generalisations mentioned, i found it interesting to read the "not-so-obvious" but apparent differences between the two...

One of them being, when in pain or anger, while a man prefers solitude...a woman likes to be hugged ... [Disclaimer : this is just the author's observation]

The power of a warm hug is something i came to comprehend quite late in my life... Many a times when the pain of the other person is something which i couldnt share in any way.. i used to feel very helpless and frustrated... and when i asked a friend what do i do when i dont know what to say or comfort, i was told.. give a hug... and it worked.. i felt better and comforted that i did the least i could do for the other person...

But still sometimes, i find myself holding back from giving a hug though i could have... and sometimes even i feel the need to be held close and to sleep off...

What the...

Most of you will relate to this, i guess...

...nothing

My ill at ease feelings of speaking on the phone is becoming my bane as i realise the number of my long distance relationships seem to be increasing... Though i enjoy my reclusivenesses... i fear i am savoring it more than i should..

And in time comes a friendly reminder



Then again, WHY do i fear???

These feelings are bound to go away sometime.. coz "they" say ... "Nothing lasts forever......"

So.... to last forever i guess i have to be ...